Zoe

Zoe passed on Sunday. Cue the song Spencer and I have been singing since.

 

In all seriousness though, we're hurting at home.  I'm sad because aside from being an amazing dog, Zoe was a piece of mom, a piece of Galena that had been in our family more than 10 years.  Spencer's sad because she was his first dog, the first dog he really bonded with.

In the months before her passing we both bonded with her even more.  She needed three different heart medications two times a day.  I gave her them at 11 am.  Spencer did the 11 pm duty.  Constant pills meant constant treats, and the ability to train my little 'piss monster.'  She learned to sit, to lay down.  Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?  Spencer and I also started crating her when we left the house, making us love her even more as we didn't find surprises everywhere when we returned.

The night before her passing Spencer gave her a bath for the first time.  Wish I had taken a picture of him gently washing her as she stood calmly, looking like a little rat.  In her final day we took her gardening.  So appropriate.  Mom gardened the day she passed too.  She wore her little pink coat from Spencer's mom and sat beside us patiently.   All day Sunday Spencer kept saying 'She's not looking good.'  By midday, she wouldn't eat her treats.  And by 5 pm she was hiding under our bed, ready to die.  Spencer found her, we brought her up to our bed and discussed her breathing, how bad it had gotten, whether we should put her down.  And in the next 30-45 minutes she made the call for us.  Her little tongue hung out further, started to turn blue, and she just laid down.  Soon after she wet our bed, and it was clear it was time.  We wrapped her in a towel and cuddled her, telling her we loved her.  It was really an intimate moment, and more than anything, I'm so glad we were both there for her.

We'll get another dog eventually.  But I want to wait.  I've put her crate by the attic door, along with the little steps we bought so she could hop up on our bed.  I realize she's just a dog.  And I realize, others are mourning for far more important reasons right now.  Just wanted to make note though of her passing.

George

I can't not blog about the passing of George Weyerhaeuser.  Allison's father-in-law.  Walker's dad.  Kathy's husband, and just an all-around good man passed away earlier this week.

I haven't told many people at work but when I mentioned it to one person I said I had a 'death in the family."  Because he was part of my family, maybe distantly, but he was.

Christmas 2012 (Walker, George, Allison, and my dad)

I like this picture of him.  Talking as the photo is being taken.  He was always doing that.

I still remember the first holiday we spent together.  Our family rushing around my mom's house, trying to get ready to go somewhere and George standing by the front door patiently, his fanny pack around his waist, not rushing anyone but clearly ready to go, even though I knew we were nowhere close to heading out the door.  It made me laugh then and still does.  

I'm glad Spencer got to meet him over Christmas.  And of course, I'm glad I had the chance to meet him during his final years. He will be incredibly missed.  

Workin' Hard for the Money

Equal Pay Day is tomorrow.

It's considered the date women's wages catch up to what men earned the year before.  So essentially 16 months worth of work to make the same amount as their counterparts do in 12.  

I've never thought much about the issue.  It seems like one of the issues my best friend from high school would be into her.  She's always cared about women equality.  One year for my birthday she gave me a 'Born in Vagina' shirt.  It's those type of women who care about this stuff, right?  Not me.  Until yesterday.

I got in a 'heated argument' over gender pay discrimination (really it was just an ongoing debate).
I'm still heated about it.  So that means I really care about this issue, right?  Or maybe I'm less concerned about the issue than I am about people acknowledging it.  I think that's it. Either way, acknowledge.  

Amy's Moving On Up

Amy is moving!  To Champaign,  next month.
A new home.  New caretakers.  A new life for here.  It's incredibly exciting.

In celebration, this video again.  Uploaded nearly a year ago as the hunt for a new home brought Amy to a place in the Chicago area, that didn't work out.

Crying at Work

I cried at work on Friday, and it wasn't the first time.
I believe I'm up to three cries at work now.  I don't think I've even cried that much in my personal life lately.

This instance on Friday was sparked by frustration, as it always is.  Frustration that I can't express without tearing up.  As a woman working to be respected and break gender barriers (I'm the only female doing camera work at the station), these tears don't suit me.  But somehow they're always there.  Whenever I have a point to get across, or a complaint to bring up.

I'm pretty sure I've cried at every job I've had.  At least every professional job, which is where it's especially appropriate, right?

My boss pulled me into her office as I fought back tears on Friday.  Told me I'm doing great, asked what's really bothering me.  It was a nice talk.  I even expressed to her how much I hate my inability to hold back tears.  It undermines my opinion further.  She told me just to wait.  That down the road when I have kids, when there are bigger issues in front of me on a personal level, the stuff that's getting to me at work won't even matter.  Not that it shouldn't she said, but it just won't.

So now I wait.  To stop taking work so seriously.  And to learn how to care about work without crying about it.

One year.

At this time last year, I was sleeping.  Oh, the joys of an overnight shift.
But in all seriousness, at this time last year I was single.  Fresh off a breakup.  Living in Chicago.  And working in radio.
At this time last year, I also met Spencer.

After a day of running around downtown, turning stories for a radio station that no-longer exists, I opted to go to the Chicago Reader's Anti-Valentine's Day Party at the Logan Square Auditorium. A couple of my friends, already in relationships, were headed there.  I went alone, got there way before them, and made random conversation with Ashley, Spencer's sister.  She then introduced me to him once he came inside from a smoke-break (a year later that habit is long gone).

I love this picture because if you look closely you can see Spencer and I during one of our first conversations.  We're in the lower left-hand corner.

We spent the rest of the evening chatting.  Left together and said our goodbyes on the train.  The next morning as I trudged to work, he text me.  Funny, I still remember where I was sitting and how much I smiled to hear from him.

Anyway,  I'm feeling sappy today.  Not because it's Valentine's Day but because a year ago I met this great guy who is now a major part of my life.  

Wear Red Day

It's national Wear Red Day.  A day to raise awareness about women's heart health.  About heart disease, which kills more women than all forms of cancer combined.  Interestingly, while heart disease takes the life of 1 in 3 woman, apparently only 1 in 5 think they are at risk.  I know I'm at risk, at least with the weight I've been carrying. So I'm happy to say on this 'heart healthy' day, I've been doing something about it.  I've lost ten pounds since the beginning of the year.  Weight Watchers and working out.  It makes reporting all these heart disease statistics on our morning program today a little less scary for me:)

Family Plan

Spencer has needed a new phone since we met, which by the way, was nearly a year ago.  This past weekend, he finally got a phone that will hopefully hold a charge and with which he can get signal.  This because he change providers and joined my plan.  Yes, we now have a family plan together.  He and I didn't think much about it until we were signing the agreement.  A two-year agreement.  Spencer looked up at me when the salesman mentioned it, which made me laugh, and I totally called him out.  But we decided, eh, two years.  We've got that.  For sure.

So family, friends, plan on seeing him around for a while.

Crafts and the Cold

This old home Spencer and I live in has been cold this winter.  Just found out that's largely because our furnace has been clogged up and barely working, but the other problem, drafts.  I made this draft-stopper to help.  It reminds me of a red one my grandma had back in the day, and is, well, adorable!

A Very Merry Christmas

Family, friends, and food.  This Christmas has been amazing.  Spencer and I celebrated twice.  The weekend before the holiday at Allison and Walker's beautiful home in Champaign...and on Christmas Eve at his parents near Chicago.    I really had an amazing week and Spencer continues to say what a great holiday he had.  I, we are so lucky.

Christmas at the Forman's

And finally, a picture from our adventure Saturday.  We tried dropping our Christmas tree off at a tree recycling spot in one of Indy's public parks.  The park hadn't been plowed but we decided to risk it, drive over some old tracks and get to the appropriate parking lot to dump our tree.  Turns out those tracks weren't even on the road.  We ended up stuck in the middle of the park, on top of wood chips/grass, who know.  Spencer saved the day.

Getting Healthy

Kinda.  But look, we ran a 5k!   And this week marks Spencer's 6 month of not smoking.  Go him, go us.

Distracted

Excited for Christmas, to see my family, that my dad is traveling to see us, to give everyone their gifts, and to dress Zoe up daily in some ridiculous holiday get-up...but distracted.  It's hard to not get wrapped up in Friday's tragedy in Connecticut shooting.  Working in news makes it worse.  I nearly started crying this morning as I waited to go live on a completely different subject, because coverage of the funerals aired right beforehand.

I don't have much to say on what happened.  Not going to get into gun control, even the treatment of those with mental illness.  I'm just sad.  Feeling like most everything else is trivial right now.

Also really wishing this amazing show from the late 90s was real.  Yes, that a cat had delivered someone a newspaper with all the day's headlines, a day early...anything to prevent what happened.

The rest of my week, which I have off, will need to be filled with love and alcohol.

Lately

I've been self-conscious.  I'm back on TV and in the same television market as quite a few beautiful women.  Two weeks ago I met with a style consultant through work, which didn't help.  From my makeup to my hair and wardrobe, I was picked apart.  So self-conscious.  I'm not used to this.  It's this feeling that makes me wonder sometimes if TV is for me.

Reporting on a "jaw-dropping" fire.

If I wasn't a TV reporter, I truly feel I'd be fully comfortable with myself.  A lot of things would be different.  I'd experiment with my hair. Have a political opinion that I actually voiced.  I'd even likely get involved with some of the organizations I agree with, but can't publicly support in an effort to stay neutral.

Lately, I feel like being on TV, speaking to thousands of people daily, actually mutes me more than it does expand my voice.  Maybe that will change, I'll grow more comfortable and find my niche on screen.  I can hope, because aside from the whole 'being on air' thing, I really do enjoy being my job.  Which, I assure you, involves way more than just being on air.

Reporting from Indianapolis, Me.

Roomies

I have a job, I pay my bills, I take care of myself.  It's how it's been for years now.  In fact, I lived alone, with no roommate for nearly five years up until September when Spencer joined me in Indianapolis.

I've had to get used to some less-than-ideal things, at least I thought I had, but right now I can't come up with any.  Really.  Okay, maybe I'm a little annoyed by dirty clothes scattered here and there...and that when he throws plastic bags under the sink for re-use he ties them in a knot first.  But really, that's the most I've had to 'deal' with.

The truth, have a roommate and living with Spencer is amazing.  He makes me coffee as I get ready for work, if I'm sweating as I straighten my hair he doesn't even flinch at running upstairs to grab the fan.  He's taken on my pets as his own, feeds them and probably takes Zoe out more than I do.  And this morning, or last night, however you want to look at it, he continued his streak.  I woke up for work to find, on the kitchen table, all the grocery items I'd mentioned we needed just hours earlier along with some cash and a coupon for an oil change, which he insists I need to get immediately.  It was a tiny gesture in the overall scheme of everything he does for me, but it's a good example of why my life in Indianapolis is going so well.

I can take care of myself.  I always have.  But man, it's really nice having someone else look out for me too.

Crafts by the Christmas Tree

Proud to say, I have a real Christmas tree.  Spencer and I picked one up from a tree farm earlier this week.  We had this grand idea that we'd find the perfect tree that we'd then cut down ourselves.  Well, we cut down a tree.  But it was a weak looking one.  The best trees were already gone.  Shortly before leaving we found a pile of imported pre-cut trees at the farm and we did the unthinkable.  Took one of them instead, and placed the tree we'd just cut aside.  I know, awful, but we love our tree now.  No lights yet, that's tonight.  But here's a sneak peak.

 Last weekend was spent in the Chicago area, going to funerals.  Two women, mother to girls my age, passed.  It was tough.  Just a minute ago I was thinking about Frosty the Snowman...how he ran around the streets of town even though he knew his end was near because of that damn sun.  I guess those funerals, coupled with the holidays and loss of my mom have put me in an odd mood.

Work is going well.  Loving that they give me eight days off before the end of the year, even though I just started there in August.  I took three days off this past week.  Gave me the chance to go out in the evening like a normal person, not someone who works at 11:30 pm.  And to craft.  I finished this tree skirt...

I couldn't even tell you how I made it.  It involved a lot of random cutting.  And if you look closely, it's a mess.  My other big project, which is really just a test-run of a bigger version down the road.  Spray painting  a rug...

The rug, $1.50 from Walmart.  Some painters tape and standard spray paint, and voila!  I tried this same project last week with acrylic paint and a paintbrush.  It looked awful.  Next up, a bigger rug.

And finally, another craft project I finished about a month ago ago.  This...

I doesn't look like much, as I need to get a third mason jar...but it's a planter.  Planning to grow some herbs in the jars, which will be hung on the wall, out of the reach of the cats.

And so the weekend begins.  One with little plans, which means it should be amazing.  We're hoping to go see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra live on Sunday.  Looking into tickets in a bit.  We randomly were talking last night about how cool a live show of theirs must be, I looked into it and, of course, they're playing down the street Sunday.

Peace, love, and a five dollar growler fill (because it's Friday and that's what Friday means to me).

Mom's Cheesy Potatoes

Getting ready for family Thanksgiving this weekend.  We're holding it ahead of time because of my and my sister's crazy schedules.  It's not Thanksgiving without cheesy potato casserole.  Mom always made it for me.  And so I went back through our emails for the recipe, which I asked her for years ago.

Her email (11/25/08) sent to 23-year-old me, living in North Dakota, and not making it home for the holiday, will ensure her potatoes live on:

"i sent the recipe from a website called cooks.com. 

if you don't get it that's where i got it under potato casserole.  there are so many variations on it but the biggest difference was whether to use one or two cans of cream of something soup.  i sent the one with 2 cans.  also the onions are optional.  fyi sometimes i sprinked a little parmesan on top too but that's just more money to spend. 

note that it says 2 pounds of frozen hash browns.  that is one package if i remember correctly. 

any questions call but it couldnt be much simpler. 

i think it helps to grease the pan if the recipe didn't say so.

love love love

i'll miss you but i'm not looking forward to the "sadness" tha'll be in the air and you're going to miss that!!  love   mimsy"

I Do As I'm Told

On Friday, boss told me I'm doing well, but suggested I cut my hair and 

get a brighter colored coat.  Back Monday, and tada!

Catching Up

Posting this as I sit in a station car, waiting to go live to show off how windy it is. Yes, slow news day.

I keep regretting not blogging. Not taking a moment to pause and grasp everything in words. I'm really happy right now. I have Spencer, who is beyond amazing, my new job, and Indianapolis. It's working out.


Spencer's Halloween Costume, Indiana Governor Candidate John Gregg

Spencer has a job now, although likely temporary. He's doing contract IT work with Eli Lilly.  Working a normal schedule of 8 to 5.  Indianapolis has grown on him too.



Spencer first time camping!





Zoe's first time camping too.  She wasn't a huge fan.

The homemade carrot cake I made for Spencer's 29th.

We've tried to make the most of being here.  Last week it was a Colts game, before that we went camping with Walker and Allison nearby, and every Friday evening we get our growler filled for five bucks at Sun King Brewery, just a couple miles from our home.

Mason Jennings!

This past weekend, another one in which Spencer and I took to the town like tourists. We ran into Mason Jennings (a singer-songwriter I once had a poster of on my dorm room wall) while getting Thai. I swooned, chatted his ear off, and then, after being put us 'the list', we went to his show.
Saturday it was a dog costume contest in Broadripple.  Spencer and I threw together an Ewok costume for Zoe, who didn't end up placing.  *sigh*
We took advantage of some free Heartland Film Festival passes I acquired and saw a documentary in theaters on dyslexia. Then later Saturday night joined our neighbors for our first burlesque show, where, by the way, my transvestite cowgirl costume took 'best costume' making up for our earlier injustice.
Sunday was pumpkin carving and Ghostbusters II. And we finally put the scarecrows out that Spencer's mom gave us when the family visited us last week.

Ashley (Spencer's Sister), Spencer, and I at our first Colts game.

After every weekend, as Spencer and I settle back into our opposite schedules, he tells me 'I had such a great weekend.' And I feel the same. We're a new couple in a new city. It's pretty awesome.

Don't get me wrong, I have my days: I came home from work crying yesterday and seeing a woman at the film fest who looked like my mom from behind threw me in a depressed spiral for hours.  But still, I'm happy.



A gift from Spencer's parents.

Bingo Bango Bongo

As Spencer and I drove to 'Hanna's Haunted Acres' last night he was full of song (as usual).  The song he chose this time though, oddly familiar.  "Bingo Bango Bongo, I don't want to leave the jungle.  I refuse to go," he sang.  Bingo Bango Bongo.  My mom used to say that all the time.  She'd clap her hands together and say loudly, in a silly way, "Bingo Bango Bongo, would you like to go to the Congo?"  I always thought it was a phrase she made up, purely out of rhyming.  Thanks to Spencer, and a video game that it turns out drilled the song into his head, I now know my mom was projecting altered lyrics of an Andrews Sisters song.  A piece of my mom, and my childhood, I never fully got, being explained.
'Civilization' by the Andrews Sisters has since become our song for the last 12 hours.  Spencer hooked up with his computer speakers, and as I sat downstairs reading this morning, I heard him blasting it upstairs in our office.

Now some randomness.  First, let me brag about how amazing Indianapolis's downtown library is.  Six floors of anything, and everything you can imagine, about a mile from our home.  Glad I didn't wait to check it out.

 

And some cute pet photos.  Zoe in wrap-around shades Spencer found among his belongings.  Livey, thinking she's hiding as usual, as she sits in a small open box in the middle of the living room.  And a photo of the cats in the kitchen, gathered around me shortly after I got home from work the other morning.

Monkey Helpers

The last email my mom sent me, entitled "Check this out!" contained a link to monkey helpers for the disabled.   Made me smile this morning as I scanned old messages she sent me.